2020, balancing good v. bad in the new year

As the new year opens, I struggle to balance immense optimism and gratitude I have for my life, my loving husband, a child who makes me want to burst with joy every day, and the fuzzball pup who snuggles so close that she nearly pushes me off the bed each night with the horror taking place in the world.

In my career, I’m able to devote all my time to do what I love for the first time, to work toward a mission as personal as it gets and (mostly) on my own terms. Career fulfillment and mental health was the last piece of my life that I’d been wrestling with and now, though it’s not all perfect, everything feels like it’s coming together. And so comes the guilt.

Australia is on fire and half a billion animals are dead. Humanity is failing the environment. We may be on the brink of World War III. Migrant families are still imprisoned at the US border. The 45th is getting impeached but will not be removed from office and he will be endorsed again by his party for the next term.

This feeling is not new. How am I allowed to be happy when the world is falling apart? Does mental health advocacy matter if the world ends? If the environment is no longer livable, where does stigma against mental illness rank as an issue of concern?

Of course, I don’t have the answers. All I can do is do my personal best and fight for what I believe in. I need to make my contribution to a better future the best way I know how, to not contribute to problems knowingly, and to help as much as I can.

And most of all, hang on to hope. <3